cake dump

There aren't as many photo's to show this time but still wanted to share.

This was so fun to make!! It was for a lil girl turning 1. The tracks continue on the back as well.

The bakery has been trying to do more with cupcakes. This one didn't go over so great with the boss but I still love them!!

Made this the other day as a start to the christmas season. The topper is a candle and the side thingy is a non-edible lay on.

This is a cupcake. Yes, a cupcake. This was purely an experiment to see if I could make a poinsettia. It went over so well that a customer ordered 2 dozen.

I am not overly proud of this cake. There are things about it that seriously get under my skin because of the imperfections.! However, the customer was overly ecstatic about it and that's really the most important thing.

This was the big project of the week. A winter wedding cake. I'm very pleased with how this turned out. The flowers and holly are made of gum paste.

As always, I am learning new things all the time and trying to grow in my medium.
Til anon!

shrimp dinner

I meant to post this the other day, but couldnt find my memory card adapter.  Let me start by saying, I do not enjoy seafood. Something about the texture and flavors just don't do much for me.
Having said that... I very  much enjoy cooking seafood. Well, cooking in general...
My husband loves seafood. As a surprise, I cooked one of his favorite shrimp dishes.
*I have a very crappy camera so I apologize*

 "Garlic Herb shrimp"

Basically it's leeks, garlic, and other assorted herbs and spices. Add the shrimp and white cooking wine.

veggie and noodles in alfredo sauce.

broccoli and cheese couscous. Of all the things that my 2 year old would become obsessed with, it's couscous! she had everything on her plate and 3 helpings of couscous!! I adore children's language so for her its not "couscous"  it "kookoos"

dessert was fruit salad. yes... that is an ice cream scooper.

Needless to say, it was a fantastic dinner!!
One of the best compliments I have ever received was my husband telling me he was afraid to go out to eat because he was afraid that nowhere would have good enough food. Must mean I am doing something right!!

til anon

3 countdowns!!

Yup. 3. They are all very fast approaching as well.
The quickest of the countdowns is Christmas. Just 10 days to go. I can honestly say that I am ready. Is everything fully finished? No, but everything is planned out. A couple things I have to wait until day of (or before) because it entails baking. Freshness is kind of a big deal with these things. I honestly can not wait to see my family open their presents.

The second countdown is 3 weeks. 3 weeks and my daughter will be 3 years old. Originally I was planning on a really big party. We wanted to invite all the family from all over the place to come and celebrate. Things change though. I don't know if it was just something about this month or what but we changed our minds on that. It could also be due to the fact my husband is leaving soon, but we wanted it to be a bit more of a private event. We are going to have cake and presents and all that on her birthday but we are planning on an alternate day in a few months (when its very nice weather) and bring everyone we can together for a pool party. Or something along those lines.

The final countdown is one I'm excited for but also dread at the same time. My husbands ship-out date. 8 and half weeks. I know that it is a good thing for so many different reasons but I'm selfish enough to hold on to the negativeness of him being away. I say that but I also know that I am strong enough to not let it show. I can't promise that there won't be days where I am down and lonely, but I won't be a burden of unhappiness. I have to strong for multiple reasons, but especially for my family. On a happier note, with him going in it will mean so many wonderful opportunities for the future.

I still plan on making my dreams a reality and become a chef (as well as pastry chef). I'm working on this more by cooking new foods. I will hopefully post again tonight with pictures of last nights adventure.

til anon

10 weeks but just an update.

So yes... 10 weeks to go but it is going to fly by!!
Thanksgiving came and went in a blink of an eye. It was wonderful but it just went by too fast. My mom came to visit which was very nice. I hate that I didn't get any pictures but to be honest, I had no time to think about pictures... My mother and I cooked for 2 straight days. My lil girl helped make all the cookies. Here is a run down of all the food:
Apps
cheese platter
fruit and veggie platter
deviled eggs
Main
25 pound turkey
BBQ pork loin
10 pounds of mashed potatoes (homemade)
5 pound sweet potato cassarole
corn salad
hot damn (basically a shrimp salad my mom invented)
green bean cassarole
7 lawyer bean dip (yes this a main not an app)
butter rolls
Dessert
Apple pie
chess pie (basically a sweet custard pie) (from scratch)
Pumpkin pie (from scratch)
Cherry crumble pie
3 dozen choco chip cookies (made with splenda) (made from scratch)
2 dozen cran-raisin oatmeal cookies (made from scratch)
3 dozen peanut butter cookies (from scratch)
2 dozen choco peanut butter surprise cupcakes (make from scratch with homemade icing)
Baked apple cheesecake (from scratch)
strawberry brownie trifle
cream puffs (from scratch)

I'm sure i forgot something but the point is... there was a crap ton of food!!!
I really hate that I didnt get any pictures... oh well....
One of the great things about this Thanksgiving was my daughter's aunt having her beautiful baby! So glad she  made it into the world happy as can be.
Christmas is just around the corner and followed closely by My daughter's birthday. All that needs to be done for that is decorations and games. Crap... I still need to send invites!! O__O  *sigh* too much to do...

My husband leaves for basic in 10 weeks. I'm kinda freakin out due to the fact that time is flying by but as someone told me, I need to stay calm and enjoy this time we have.

I guess that is all for now... I really need to update with some photos...

13 weeks...

I'm not going to get overly emotional (yet) about the fact time is counting down. At this moment, I'm not even worried about it. It's not here yet so I don't want to think about it too much.
I have been trying to think of things to help keep me busy while my husband is at basic and truthfully, I haven't come up with too many interesting things. I am planning on being in the kitchen A LOT more than I probably ever have been. I hope to get my little girl to bake something all by herself (mommy only taking over the actual oven part).
One thing I am sure of is that I am overly determined to not be depressed. Well, at least I will not let it show. I don't want to be a burden on everyone I know by being mopey and hating life and etc. Plus, I don't want it to be hard on my daughter either.
I worry about how she is going to handle him being away. The nights he has to stay at work until after she is bed are already kind of tough. She always wants to know where he is and why he can't read her a story. He always does goofy voices way better than I do. So I do worry...

My husband truly is my best friend. It was great the other night, we talked for almost 3 hours about everything, and nothing at the same time. Talked about our day, what has been going on at work, talked about our hopes for once we are on a base. Talked about just how soon to try for a baby. In the past, have thrown around name ideas and wondered if we still liked the names. Still in love with the son's name but still can't decide on if we have a daughter.
Completely random but I love the name "Dante". Adam isnt totally crazy about it so he thinks it is more of a middle name type thing .  So we shall see.

I guess my mumbles are enough for now...
Just remember one thing.... "stressed" spelled backwards is "desserts"

The countdown begins.

Yesterday was a very exciting day. Adam got a phone call that he has been waiting a very, very long time to get. He got the phone call from the air force recruiter. Feb. 14 is the day he starts basic training.

14 weeks until everything changes.... forever.

Don't get me wrong, we are ecstatic about the changes, but they will be hard none the less.
For starters, I do not deal with separation very easily... that alone is going to be the biggest challenge for me. Having a daughter will definitely help me though because I can return to the "single mother" state of mind for awhile and devote every breathe to only her.

Truth is, I never seen myself as a military spouse. I never really wanted to be... I never wanted anything to do with the military. I have nothing against them and obviously I support them, but it just wasn't something I seen in my future. Things have changed since I met my husband. The more he talked about his dreams of military careers and the life he wanted to build, the more I wanted to be a part of it as well. Now here we are... 14 very short weeks until our dreams can become reality.

Adam is going into Integrated Avionics. He told me that basically -very basically- if its electronic on a plane, he will know how to fix it. Its a great start but I know what he really wants is to be an officer. So this is just a stepping stone for a brighter future.

I was asked "now that you know when you are going in, whats the plan for another child?"
It's no secret that I have been itching to have another child and truthfully, we really do want another one right now, but the responsible side of us knows that it is better to wait. So the plan is to wait until we are located on a base and settled in. This is for multiple reasons but the biggest one is Adam really doesnt want to take any chances of something going wrong if we are trying to move while I'm pregnant. I love him so much...

So in a nutshell... Things are falling into place and things are going to change. I'm scared out of my mind but excited to see what is beyond that horizon.

I have a problem...

The first step is to admit you have a problem right?? RIGHT??!?!?!??!?

Well....I have a problem.. .... I. Am obsessed with wrapping paper.....
Might I remind you the title of my blogs "Welcome to my insanity"   Now you understand...
Seriously I dont know why I love it so much. When I say I'm obsessed, its not that I want EVERY wrapping paper that is out there, its more that I honestly can't pass a beautiful roll of paper. I'm also kinda picky... I'm not a big fan of character paper, like Dora, Spongebob, etc. I love metallic silvers and golds, Shiny..... I think that is the key... SHINY!!!!!!! I was well behaved today though... I only bought 1 roll. (I seriously have over 20 never opened rolls left over from last year)

Here are some pictures just so you know im not kidding...

This is my Christmas box. Bought it last year after christmas as well as most of that paper...
Here are a few of my fav's

I cant help loving my camo paper!

I probably would have bought every single roll of this if they this hadn't been the last one!! You have to love the shinyness.

More shiny!!

This is the only roll I have bought this year... seriously how am i supposed to NOT buy it?!?!

These are too big to fit in the container. I know I said I dont like character paper... and thats true, I didnt buy these, my mom did so im looking forward to using them up!! LMAO!!


I know I'm crazy and thats fiiiiine with me. You have to admit, there could be far worse things than wrapping paper!!! And just so you can get an idea of how all this paper works together under a christmas tree, here is last years picture.

I love the lamp shaped one over there... NO way is anyone gonna guess that one... and i know what your thinking... holy crap that is a lot of stuff... my dad likes to go over board on the gifts... there were 6 of us opening presents as well as a handfull for other family, but ya. It was still a lot!

christmas success!!!

I have been meaning to post some pics of the adorable clothes we have bought for christmas/birthday gifts so here we go :)

This is probably my fav of all. Found this at Old Navy. I didnt even want to save it for later, I just wanted to put it on her immediately! The pic kinda sucks because it makes the sweater dress look really wide but I still love it.

We found this today and I couldn't pass it up. I think her Aunt Kate will really like this one. This is from Carters. No, there are not 4 legs... Just couldn't decide which leggings I liked better.

Another adorable outfit. The stipulation on getting the skirt was that it had to have either leggings or tights under them so that was easy enough!! It was actually really hard to choose which one to get because they had so many very cute colors. This is a JCPenny find.

Because there is so much theater, music, and dance influence in the family, I couldn't help myself with this shirt. This is another Carter find.

This is one that Adam couldn't leave without. I know its supposed to be a boy shirt but who really cares?? She loves dino's and she is cute in ANYTHING she puts on! Also from Carters.

Not really my normal style for what we buy for her but I thought this would be cute for the holiday season.  A Carter find.

I simply adore this shirt!!! Great find at ToysRUs!

One of her favorite things is Butterflies. No... the sleeves are not different lengths, they can be rolled up and fastened with a button. Cant wait to see her in this. This is from Old Navy

More proof that she loves her butterflies. These are from Carters and I dont know why I didnt just put these in with the other pants.... oh well....

I believe all these came from JCPenny. We bought a couple other pants the day we got these but we went ahead and let her use them now since most of her 2T's are too short.


I honestly cant wait for her to open these on christmas and her birthday :)

pumpkin muffin fail....

I was very excited about trying a new recipe for muffins. Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Muffins!! I found the recipe somewhere online and it sounded so delicious that I knew I had to try it!! I had also planned on trying to make a tutorial on how to make them as I went........

Thats not gonna happen....

I guess the title is a little misleading because, truthfully, they do taste really good. The pumpkin is subtle and not overwhelming. Would you understand what I meant by saying the pumpkin in these are a quiet spice addition?? I really dont know how to explain it... It's there, but its not at the same time...
I did a little to much chocolate chips and I wish they were mini but the only thing I had where regular sized. It was just a but too much I think.


The biggest problem is they are a bit gummy... If that makes any sense lol. Anyone who has ever overmixed their muffins will understand (i think)

So i will be saving a tutorial until i can get the fluffyness that i am looking for.

photo dump

I've wanted to post pics of cakes I'm making at the bakery AS I get them done, but lets face it... life gets in the way... so here is a cake dump of what I've done so far (actually, just the ones I really like)

This was one of he first cakes I made for the Bakery. I really love how this one turned out. 7 year old girl LOVES frogs.

A simple cake but I love chocolate icing cakes.

Another chocolate buttercream but its also showing my roses and rose buds.

a fall birthday cake was all they told me. so just airbrushed different fall colors and piped brown leaves for the border.

Thank goodness for the black sugar sheets. I really didnt want to pipe the stripes lol. Anyway, this cake was for the bakery's neighbor at the Salon. Not too thrilled with some of the stripes but it sill turned out to be a cute cake.

Another cake for the salon girls. Just practicing a couple different flowers. First time ever doing sunflowers.

40th birthday cake using car pick. I meant to take the picture before getting it in the box but kinda forgot lol.

Something the Bakery started is selling individual cupcakes. I didn't to show just regular, boring cupcakes so I had some fun and made a sunflower on top.



Hope you enjoyed and stay tuned for more.

"Oh hamburgers..."

My Promise

There was once a time that I dreamed of spotlights and standing ovations. I dreamed of music pulsing in my veins. I admit, I never wanted the spotlight. Honestly!! I'm humble enough to know that my voice wasn't good enough for that. But I thought my dancing and back up vocals could be enough.
Broadway was my ultimate goal but realistically I figured that would never happen. I did have a chance to perform for Royal Carribean Cruise Line.... But I gave up my dreams..... Distant words told me I wasnt good enough, cruel words told me it was foolish, unguided words told me it was no way to make a living.... I gave up ever dream. I made excuses for walking away, "old injuries"  "afraid of leaving"  "wanted to stay in college"  Mostly I was afraid of failure because no one believed I could do it.

I stand here today making a promise to my daughter and any future child I may have someday... actually, I make this promise to any child I might have some influence on...
I promise with every fiber of my existence, I will not let you down by not supporting you.  I will do everything I can to help you reach the stars you dream of. Your dreams are more important than anything. I promise I will always love and support you. If you are gay, straight, bi, transgender, turn yourself green... I dont care! I will love you! I know you will go through phases that I won't like or agree with but I will still love you and do my best to at least make sure you are safe and happy. I promise I will never turn away when you are seeking guidance. I promise I will always be there to listen when you need help. I love you so much and there is nothing on this Earth that could ever change that. 

I miss him so much....

I've been thinking a lot about my baby brother lately. He would 16 months old now.  He was my brother but so many days it hurts so much deeper than that. His pictures are on the walls, on the top of the computer, on the entertainment center and throughout the house. I'm so great full for those pictures... regardless of how much it hurts when i see them.

lets back up a year and a half... My dad was seeing this girl and got her pregnant. Everyone was so unbelievably excited!! The moment they realized it was a boy, its like a new energy took over my dad. He became so much more lively!! That day in May 2010 will haunt me for the rest of my days... Dad got a call that she was in the hospital and he needed to get there very quickly. Something was very wrong, I had never seen my dad cry very much, but you could see the color completely drain from his face and he teared up. We rushed to the hospital as fast as could and headed to the maternity ward. ........ my baby brother, Carter, was gone. The placenta had detached... and he drowned in the blood. My hands are shaking so bad writing all this...... The doctors said that the only way they could have saved the child was if she was already on he operating table. They told us there was only a 5 minute window when that occurs so there was no hope.

The part that haunts me is seeing Carter... I got to hold him. He was just so purple and blue. The only part of him that wasnt was a small patch on his stomach in the shape of a heart. I held him and just cried and cried. There were no words from anyone. It was so hard to realize that such a perfect looking child was taken away.

15 months have passed and when I think of him I still start to cry. Most of the time is silent tears because I hate crying in front of people but when I'm alone, like when I started to type this blog, its so hard not to cry. I miss him so much.

There was a time when I thought that when I had my own son, I wanted to name him Carter Michael in memory of him and in honor of my father. I still like the idea but my husband really does not like the name Carter. I will always think of him and I will never let him leave my heart.

Looking ahead

I've been having a mental issue lately... (wow thats sounds bad)
My husband found out last week that he is 4th in line on the list to head to basic. In of itself, this is good! This means he is closer to making his dream of being in the air force come true. The sooner he gets in, the sooner we will be able to move to a base. *This also means the sooner we can have a baby ^^ * The sadness in all this is due to the fact that we didnt think he would be going until Feb. -ish anyway... So after the holidays... So I've been making plans for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and ESPECIALLY A's birthday.
I knew when Adam told me he wanted to be in the military that it meant missed holidays and birthdays, I just didn't expect it so soon... Special occasions, like the fact he will be at tech school on our one year wedding anniversary... That one I already mentally told myself we wouldnt be together but still....

I know that I'm not alone in this feeling. He is having a very hard time knowing he will be away from his family. He will never admit it but I seen him tear up when he realized he would miss her birthday.

On a completely different note....
The adoption papers are fully signed (on our end anyway) so we are one step closer with that!!
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.
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I just realized you have no idea what I'm talking about... The short version is my husband is legally adopting my daughter. For the full, in-depth story you will have to stay tuned!!

Judgement

I've actually been meaning to post this for awhile now but kept forgetting to sit down and do it!!

Anyhoo... I don't consider myself to be an overly judgmental person. I'm talking day-to-day life and parenthood type things. You are going to do things how you want and your going to raise your child how you want. To be honest, that's how it should be!! Yes, I'm going to offer my own tid-bits on certain things but I only offer out of wanting to help. Lets face it, all mom's loving handing out free advice!!

I am not judging you on how you raise your kids. If you chose not to breastfeed, that's fine. Your choosing cloth diapers, hey power to you!! Are you mentally prepared for the clean up?? Your letting your kid sit in front of a TV for 5 hours a day, that's your decision; I highly disapprove but I'm not going to belittle you for it.

I let my experiences out in hopes of helping others, is someone going to pass judgment on me? Probably... and that's fine. **BUT** If you are willing to dish out judgments on other people... you had better be willing to accept that someone is going to pass judgment on YOU!! Just because you put yourself on a platform of self indulgence doesn't excuse the hypocrisy of your actions and words.

This post isn't being directed at any particular person, frankly, there are too many people I know that think their choices are far more superior and therefore have a "higher than thou" attitude. They think they can look down on everyone who didnt make the same choices and to be honest, I'm pretty fed up. You've breastfed for an entire year, you've fed your baby only organic food that you grew yourself, your chose cloth diapers... etc. etc... I get it, your on a high horse of "I'm better than you"   

I wasnt able to breast feed... I had the few days of colostrum and after a month of trying, I just couldnt produce enough. Yes I tried pretty much everything to help... So dont you dare look down on me... I'm happy for you. I truly am!! But there is no need for your attitude.

As for the organic complex... ya I admit I was on that kinda kick when my daughter was on baby food. I bought organic Gerber. So what... I never rubbed it in your face, I only asked that family would try to stick to the same diet. (correct me if i'm wrong but) as my memory serves, I never through a fit if it wasnt organic. I wanted to do best for my girl but I tried to do it without being smug!
You CAN go the natural route WITHOUT being a pompous smug-ass!!
Get off your high horse... PLEASE we are pretty fed up with it!

On a final note, at the end of the day, it doesnt matter if its a cloth diaper or disposable... your still elbow deep in baby poop!

hallelujah

I've shared this on my facebook but I could not resist sharing here as well... Not to mention it will be easier to find on here if I ever need a quick link for it...

I honestly hope no one would take offense to this video, I dont really see how you could... I wish I could have found this exact group with the full intro about how this is homage to the silent monks of (somewhere very foreign and remote).

Hope you all enjoy

ketchup

haha play on words make me laugh...

anyway. I've decided I need to carry a small notebook with me from now on. The past few days I have thought of things I want to blog about but as soon as I get home I completely forget what I want to talk about.

*I love my second job. It's honestly something I see myself doing for the rest of my life. Not at the same shop mind you, but the fact that its at a Bakery and I get to decorate cakes and make bread, its a dream come true. I have so many ideas for amazing cakes that I want to create!! I have a sketch book that Ive been using strictly for cake ideas. I'm probably going to have it with me at work since we have clients who are looking for something unique. Hopefully soon my boss is going to teach me to use fondant. I have never used it before but he thinks it could really accelerate out cake sales. I totally agree!! Plus, its easy to paint on fondant rather than just "trying" to create something with icing and spatulas... it can be a pain...

*On the subject of cakes.......My daughter's birthday isnt for another 5 months but today I started looking at ideas for cakes and party themes. Originally I was thinking about doing a pirate theme. The invitations were going to be on paper designed to look like very old treasure maps and sent in a bottle. The party was going to have a treasure hunt with a huge chest filled with pirate themed toys and goodie bags and what not. Then I realized she isnt quit old enough to truly understand the concept of a treasure hunt... So my husband and I have decided to go with a safari theme; not the super cheesy baby safari thing but a bit more age appropriate. I'm ordering the supplies needed to do the cake myself and the invites are going to be on jungle tree leaf stationary.

* In response to my previous post, I did FINALLY express my concerns to Dad. I told him I was worried about the fact she already lies and manipulates to get what she wants and many of the behavioral issues I mentioned on the last post. -----------Before I continue, I had taken the notion that dad was either in complete and total denial or he knew and just refused to accept it and preferred to stay blind to the facts.----------      Dad's response was "Ya...I know..."   *Jaw invisibly drops* As politely as could possibly be said, I basically said "well then you should tell her mom that your keeping with the custody agreement and she can just deal with it!!"   
Does this mean things will actually change?? I kinda doubt it but we shall see...
And Kate, we have had many discussions behind closed doors that she will probably end up as a pregnant teen due to her mothers lack of teaching M any better. When I mentioned the whole teen pregnancy thing, dad's response was simply "well we just wont let that ever happen".  again... we shall see.

*So very excited about the amazingly cute outfit that finally came in the mail for my daughter. A beautiful deep purple sweater dress, grey leggings, and matching purple and grey shoes. I will post pics tomorrow (I'm currently too lazy to track down my camera just for one pic)

I guess that's about it for tonight. Waking up at 330 and working 2 jobs makes one not want to stay up past 8...
til anon

wish i could disown you

I am so tired of parents refusing to actually be a parent!!! Do people not understand just how bad things are going to turn out?? have you seen the teenage girls who bitch until they get what they want? Well, imagine that but about 20 times worse with even less manners and you have my annoying ass half sister. I hate admitting it but I truly do not like her. I have to love her but there are seriously days where I cant even do that. You may think, oh its just sibling rivalry. um... she's 8 and I'm 26... there is NO rivalry.
Why is she so bad in my eyes?? Well, it's not necessarily all her, it's mostly the parents. We share the same father and he is very laid back in his approach to parenting. Even when I was a kid he kinda did his own thing and expected the me to do my own thing with out making too much noise or a mess.... Its almost worse with Micayla. Here is the typical interaction... Dad sits down to watch tv and micayla goes to the other room and does whatever she wants... Thats the whole night....
Then there is dinner. Oh dear god is this a fuckin mess!! There are 3 things she will eat. Cheese Pizza, cereal, and ice cream. occasionally she will eat mac and cheese but if its too creamy, its too gross...
Tonight I made pizza. A simple pepperoni cause thats all we had... I had mine and sat down to relax after putting my daughter to bed. The brat walks in and refuses to eat the pizza because its not cheese. Dad tells her to take them off and its the exact same as eating cheese. She starts to cry... (are you fuckin kidding me, crying over damn pizza) so dad bitches about it and gets a bowl of cereal to shut her up.
STOP PROMOTING THE BEHAVIOR!!!!! This is basically the outcome of every situation where its something she doesnt like. "I dont like it" *major cry* dad gives her cereal...  Be a damn parent and grow a pair!!   Basically my dad refuses to stand up to the bad behavior and just gives in to the demands.

Then there is her mom. Does everything to be the "best friend" instead of being an actual parent. For crying out loud she gave her 8 year daughter a facebook account... WTF is wrong with her!!!!! I have picked micayla up from school on many occasions wearing extremely inappropriate clothing, whether its too short, too see through (ya see through), or too big (the top of the shirt was below her tata's) It seriously makes me want to punch a bitch. She is 8 years old and still doesnt know how to put away her dirty dishes... actually she doesnt know how to do anything for herself. Someone has to get her whatever it is she wants to eat or drink (and she never says please or thank you) she cant get her own clothes (which honestly, she cant pick matching clothes anyway) she is always interrupting and no matter what the conversation is, she will just start talking about herself.
I remember taking her to the mall when Adam and I were trying to pick out wedding rings. We were talking to the sales rep when she pipes in "I had to clean yellow stuff out of my ears this morning"  No body wants to know this!!! She has never been taught what is appropriate!!
At 7 she would still pull her dresses up over her underwear and walk around like it was no big deal. Sit with her legs spread to show the whole world what she was wearing. Not just at home either.... she would constantly do this when in public.

I know this is a lot of bitching and it may seem over exaggerate but I assure you I'm not... I cant stand her and I cant stand the lack of parenting. I hate admitting that I cant wait to get out of here and I will never look back. I cant wait to get my daughter away from this complete disaster.

*collapse*

Lets just say its been a crazy trip of a week!!!

My last post was about making cakes for my dad's birthday. Well, I have pics of 2.

Extremely simple cake. Am I proud of this one??

well no... It's just too simple for my personal taste. But at least it looks like it could have come from a bakery...

Top view of cake 2. I really didnt plan it our very well so its not symmetrical (which is seriously driving me crazy)

side view of 2nd cake. I havent done basket weave in a couple years so its not perfect, but these cakes were more practice than anything else. I mean yes, I would have loved for them to have been perfect but eh... It's not like the men around here really pay that close of attention lol.

FridayI went to the new Bakery and Bistro that opened in town. Been in there a couple times, but really wanted some cookies!! Anyway, the boss is actually someone I sort of worked for when I was at Summer Fresh. He knew I could decorate cakes so we started talking about if he was looking for workers. Lucky for me, he was!! He asked me to drop by on Saturday with a Resume and we could do an interview. Well, it honestly wasnt an interview. It was a "lets get you a schedule!"
I'm so excited about working there. Started on Monday. 5 am to 230pm. It was an insane day but I wouldnt change it for anything. I can honestly say my job is doing something I love!! Truth is, very few people can say that...
This morning I worked 5am to 845 and then headed to my second job at my dad's shop. Before opening, I swept the eating area and all I could do was smile the entire time. I could truely see myself owning my own bakery someday!

The reason for the title.......you try waking up at 345 in the morning, work a 9 and half hour shift with no lunch, try to take care of a 2 year old and then follow it with another 345 wake up for job one and then head to job 2 til 430. Its exhausting!!
But again, I absolutely love what I'm doing and I look forward to posting cakes in the future.

Til anon

Tomorrow should be interesting...

What in the world do get your own father for his birthday?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
I know he likes John Wayna, fathers day took care of that though... got him the whole collection of his movies...
He likes space documentaries and such, but he already owns just about every one of them...
LOOOVES nascar... already owns every movie/documentary made about the greatest driver ever (earnhart senior duh!)
So I really have no idea what to get him...
I cant even do a nice dinner for him...  his idea of a nice birthday dinner is hamburger helper. I honestly cant remember the last time i made that stuff. Guess I will have to tomorrow...
Speaking of tomorrow, since its my Daddy's birthday  (yes, a 26 year old can still say Daddy!!) I will be making cakes from scratch. ahh! you noticed the plural on that. yes cakeS. 4 to be exact. why so many?? In a previous post I mentioned I am building a professional portfolio of my cake work and a birthday gives me the perfect excuse to go a lil crazy!  I know one will be blue and white, I'm thinking about making a second one to Nascar-ish, one will be for "Pe-Pa" as he is so affectionately known, and I'm not to sure about the last. I'm thinking about making it a basket weave for the simple reason of needing to practice!
I very much look forward to tomorrow and be busy in the kitchen. The key is going to be baking the cakes while lil girl eats breakfast and decorating while she is taking a nap!! I honestly think that is going to be the only way I manage to pull this off.

And of course I will post pics tomorrow of all the wonders that shall come from my kitchen!

"A messy kitchen is a happy kitchen, and this kitchen is delirious!"
til anon

Clothes shopping please!!

Truth is, its still half a year before my daughter will even need new clothes. Most of her pants will carry her over the next year and her shorts will definitely still work next summer!! I'm itching to go clothes shopping!! The problem with that is I am very limited!!
I have Wal-Mart, Target, Carters, and Osh Kosh. That's really it!! I hardly find anything at wal mart other than a few "daycare" clothes. Target just isnt my style and frankly, ends up looking kinda weird on her. Carters... I USED to like them. I dont know what happened to fashion this last year but its honestly been crap. Not to mention the fact that for some reason they only 2 different types of jeans... I mean seriously??? Osh Kosh is ok I guess but there are hardly any options...

Springfield is an hour away and I just cant make that drive as often as I like but there are wonderful options there. JCPenny happens to be one of my favorite places for clothes for my daughter. So many wonderful options as well as very beautiful dresses...

I get distracted too easily when trying online shopping, but im willing to give it a try. So I'm here reaching out for advice. Where are some good online stores for infant and toddler clothing??? --yes infant because I have to shop for a couple baby showers :)

Oh and more specifically, I'm looking for dresses, along the line of  "Sunday best" dresses. 

new room

In truth, I should have posted this earlier but I've been rather distracted.
Over the weekend I painted my daughters bedroom. I've never painted a room before so it was a bit of an experience. The overall wasnt hard, it was the detail work in the butterflies... But lets wait for that...

Thursday night was spent getting everything prepped. Laying down the drop clothes, taping off the stripe (which is a pain the arse when your level is all of 6 inches long) and getting the ceiling and base boards taped.

full DAY 1
Base coat. Seriously took all freakin day due to a really cheap crappy paint roller.   I honestly can not express how very much I love this shade of blue. I'm very sad that the following pictures do the colors NO justice...

Late LATE into the night, was able to put on a second coat. well... My husband helped put on a second coat.

He kept calling the purple "pink".... but anyway... I really appreciate his help with this. Thank goodness the second coat went on extremely quick!!

DAY 2 
Stencils!  I have never done stencil work in my life. I can honestly say I goofed that all to hell on the first try. I thought you just tape the stencil and can go over it with a roller brush... I will spare you the horrible picture (because I forgot to take one) but lets just say it was really really bad!! So thanks to youtube, found a tutorial on proper stenciling. Still turned out to be a pain in the ass due to the fact I had 4 stencils, and ever single butterfly had to have 2 coats.

By the time Adam got home, I seriously needed a break. Silver Dollar City was still doing moonlight madness so we went for awhile. We really didnt get to do much because it was so insanely busy!! We still had a lot of fun though. It was nice to be able to take some time to be a couple.
After the City, had to get back to work...
Big problem though... the power went out. I was determined get those damn things finished!! I think I had 5 candles lit and an emergency lcd lantern hanging from my belt. But frankly, it was still too dark...

Sunday.... FINAL day
Got up as soon as I could to get those things finished. We didnt have to pick Alayna up until 5 so there was still plenty of time to get everything done but seriously had to hurry!!

I wasnt too sure about the white stripe at first, but after getting the butterflies, I really do like it. And for the record... Those are neon green butterflies... not yellow... No seriously!! The paint is green in the can, green on the brush, but for some reason, they look really yellow on the wall.

Finally, everything was done. Added some white butterflies, did a few touch ups, and cleaned everything up. Got the furniture back in place.... An extremely sleep deprived weekend total worth it!!

I cant wait to replace that dresser!!! We are wanting to find a double drawer dresser.

Oh and I completely forgot to mention... The entire time, I only had 2 cd's to listen to... Honestly makes you go a little crazy listening to the same things over and over... why not listen to the radio?? couldnt get in any stations... But all in all, it was alright.

I'm very happy with how everything turned out and so is my daughter (which is who matters). Now I just have to figure out the next project :)
til anon

just an update.

I honestly dont have a lot of time to make any good posts this weekend. Insanely busy!!! With what you may ask...

Well, for starters, Im painting my daughters bedroom (there will be a post on that when it is fully done). Its not exactly a small room so it has been rather exhausting! Wouldn't be so bad but since Adam is working, Ive been doing it by myself. However he did help me last night with some putty compound stuff to fix a few places on the walls...

I making a few different cakes this weekend. Not for anyone in particular but its for the soul purpose of building a professional portfolio. I've taken pictures of cakes I've done over the years and I think I should build a portfolio for future job prospects... (which i have a very awesome post about THAT coming later)

I'm also trying to reconnect with my husband this weekend since our daughter is with her grandparents this weekend. Unfortunately, we fall into the same situation that so many married with kids couples become... so focused on the children that we forget to be a couple.

So thats what I've got going on right now...
 til anon

not inspired...

as the title says, I have been extremely un-inspired to do anything creative lately... I dont really want to post any new blogs simply because my brain is rather lazy and i refuse to just slap words of nonsense into a blog. I haven't really wanted to cook anything extraordinary quit frankly because its hard to devote myself to the kitchen with  a 2 year old running around...

Maybe Im just feeling lazy... from a creative stand point anyway... My life is not lazy!! With an attention seeking 2 year old, I literally CANT be lazy! Not that im complaining about that.... I love playing with my daughter. she is just so full of life. its hard not to want to play along with her.

ugh... maybe its just this ridiculous heat!!

all day in the kitchen!!

*Please ignore grammer and sentence structure mistakes... I tend to write the way I think*

Some women clean, some go for a ride, some (like me) cook!  ...When they are angry!
Last night, the husband and I got into a fight (dont ask cause not going there) ended up with him sleeping on the couch. Needless to say, I have not been in a good mood today... When I get upset, I cook. A LOT!!! With a 2 year old running around, I didnt cook as much as I normally would but still made a crap ton of food. Even better, my daughter helped :) 2 years old and loves to help mommy cook in the kitchen!!
First thing was start the cake to get it in the oven. Just a basic yellow cake (from scratch) but nothing fancy. While that was in the oven, made huge batch of pancakes that I can Freeze and grab what I need in the mornings. In between that, started the bread. Pull cake from oven let cool on a rack, continue bread. Set the bread aside so it could rise, finished pancakes, started on cream cheese mints (which I realized I havent had since my daughters baby shower). Took a short break to put my lil one down for a nap and catch up on dishes.
*breathe*
Finish the mints and put in the fridge, crap almost forgot to make icing.
Yes I prefer to make my icing from scratch. I plan on a tutorial for this in the future.
Get icing made, colors combined and all tools set up.
But first have to put bread in oven. And grab a quick bite to eat...
Decorate cake, unload dishwasher and put in almost a full load pull bread from oven. Its 2!! Had to be at the lawyer's at 3 so needed to wake up daughter and she. was. pissed!! She cried til 5 minutes before we made it to lawyer. Got that taken care of, had to get home to start dinner.
About 5 started by first making a salad then started on the chicken parmigiana which consists of breaded chicken in plain bread crumbs with shredded parm. and italian blend of spices. In the oven (much better than fried) spaghetti, marinara, and some mozzarella to top it all off.
*breath* I think that about covers everything... Oh.. pictures?? *smiles* thought you would never ask!!

Delicious English Muffin loaf bread.

I'm not posting a pic of the pancakes... I mean come on... its just pancakes...

cream cheese mints *drool*

rather tropical I think...

Close up on mints. Adam has declared these are his favorite things EVER!!! :)

Top of cake. As it says, its just because I wanted to... and I needed to practice. It's been awhile since I made a cake.

Side details. Maybe a bit overboard, but oh well. By the way... I hate wilton's "leaf tip" it sucks!! Need to find just a "v" tip.

Simple salad of shredded carrot and Romain lettuce. ...yes its a pic of a salad... yes I'm just that board..

Chicken with moz. And let me just say... Holy crap are chicken breasts ever huge!! I wish I lived closer to Springfield so I could buy organic...

When you put it all together.................. here you go...

I know my chicken parm isnt the normal way, but I like it.
And I'm going to let you all assume *waves hand across screen* I clean as I go.
......what?? you dont believe me?? damn gotta work on that Jedi stuff...
You really dont want to know how big of a mess I can make in a single kitchen. It was damn scary here! 3 loads of dishes, a bottle and a half of cleaner, and a full roll of papertowels... just imagine the craziest mess and I probably did worse... lol!! I hate cleaning as I go. I would rather just get everything done THEN clean!!